Forgot to mention in my last post just how much getting a comment from Pete Townshend made me smile! What a star, I love his idea of posting his story ' the boy that heard music' on his blog so he can get feedback from his audience and hope I can be more useful than just saying how much I love the story every week as already I know I will. I'm fascinated by the whole idea of the 'music of the spheres' as I had a very powerful dream a few years ago, which has really stuck with me, where Pete (the very same) lead me down a path in a garden and as I walked the most amazing music played. I was recently on a website reading about near death experiences and discovered people often hear music when they have N.D.E, the way they described the music was just like the music in my dream, I've always had difficulty articulating it, I will try to find it again and post what they said. It was on this website I first heard the phrase 'music of the spheres' and read up about it a little although there doesn't seem to be all that much info on the web, so I can't wait to see what Pete has to say in his story. Strangley enough when I had the dream I didn't know about Pete's interest on the matter, I'd listened to lots of who music though so may have picked it up subconciously, who knows, it's a funny old world!

I know I have a habit of reading into things, maybe this is not healthy, I know it can be a sign of madness, but I'm far from mad, maybe a little odd but that never did anyone any harm so I see it as reading the signs of life, like the boy in 'The Alchemist' I'm really not sure what this means though. Anyway it started with my dream last night, I dreamt that me and my partner had to move out of our flat and into another one in a highrise building, we live on the river and although our flat is very pocky I love the view of the river, so in my dream I was extremly distressed crying and sobbing, it was one of those dreams where you wake up feeling completely emotionally exhausted, like you really crying in your sleep. When I woke up I was extemely relieved that it wasn't true and the first thing I did was to go and look at the river. Now this starts sounding really silly here but it was just plain wierd, on the opposite side of the river by the bank was five apples bobbing up and down, they were quite spread out but perfectly spaced like some mischievious little pixie had planted them there purely to confuse me. There are no apple trees on the other side of the river, so they couldn't have fallen in, somebody could have put them there but why? The number 5 and apples are very symbolic to me so I couldn't help but see this as something more than merely some apples in the river. The picture above is of my river and if you look very closely you'll see three of the apples I couldn't get far back enough to get in all 5. My boyfriend said it must be some kind of witchcraft and that they are there for protection, and that maybe I'd put them there in my dream, I don't think he actually believes this and I'm pretty sure I don't posess such powers but it's seems oddly associated with the dream. Who knows anybody got any ideas let me know. Blimey I do sound crazy as hell!

Goodness I have got the blogging bug today, three times in one day! I just watched the final part of the Scorsese Bob Dylan documentary on BBC2 and it was bloody excellant. Dylan was portrayed as a much more sympathetic character in the second part of the documentary and by the end you really feel for him, all the abuse he gets for 'going electric' really seems to start taking it's toll he looks so tierd and almost defeated by the end of his tour in 1965 quite different to the arrogant cocky Dylan we saw in 'Don't Look Back'. I wonder how different things would have been if he had towed the line and stuck to his folk roots, the world would probably be a different place altogether. We'd certainly have missed alot of his best music.
The documentary also showed alot of interviews with the press, I love the way he refuses to play along with the ridiculous questions he's asked, he could have made up aload of bullshit, the kind that people these days are only too good at making up, but he didn't, he may look like he's being evassive or aloof but I think he's just being honest, he really isn't trying to convey some great message in his songs, he was just doing what he does.
I also respect the fact he didn't want to get dragged into the whole political game. I think there is something far more honest about people who refuse to have strict unwavering principles, nothing is ever certain. In the words of Groucho Marx "these are my principles if you don't like them I have others". People got what ever they wanted from his lyrics and this is what matters, they mean different things to different people and if you got some political message from them then all well and good, you could just as likely get something completely different from them. In this way I guess he was a muse as well as a musician.
When I was at school I loved the early folk protest songs he wrote and I got a strong political message from them and even though I wasn't living in the deep south in 60's america I could relate them to life at an all girls school the midlands. I think it's funny now, how serious I took it all, 'but I was so much older then I'm younger than that now' (sorry couldn't resist that one.) Having not really listened to a great deal of Bob Dylan in the past few years it struck me watching the programme how much his song touch me, someone spoke about how he tapped into some collective unconciousness of sixties America, I would go as far to say that he tapped into an eternal universal collective conciousness. I'm not a big fan of his work after he retreated to woodstock, not sure if it's the fact he found 'God' or whether it's just his voice, I do think that that kind of connection has a limited life and is not the sort of thing that can be forced and he some how lost it along the way, probably trying to hard to find it. He still gets there every now and again though, 'A Twist of Fate' is one of my favourite songs, funnily enough I used to sing it as a child, pretty heavy subject matter, I probably thought it was about something else entirely.
But anyway thank goodness for Bob Dylan and thank goodness people recognize his brilliance and make documentaries about him! Time for bed. Good night.

Last night I watched 'The Corporation' a documentary film about the power of large corporations and the terrible affect they have on people and the environment . It interviews people such as Noam Chomsky (who I think is a fucking hero and is always worth listening to) and explores all areas of 'the corperation'. There is a website at www.thecorporation.com that can explain it all much better than I can. It's well worth a watch but do be prepared to be depressed to fuck by it all even though it does try it's best to give you some hope. One thing that really struck me hard was the fact that really although these large companies hide behind the fact that they are made up of lots of people it all comes down to the individual and the desisions made by them and that the individual is responsible. I started to think of my own job, I work in a print shop and here I am always banging on about how much I love trees and yet in my job I print onto paper that has come from the indonesian rainforest, I ask you how hypocritical is that! Today I stood printing out 1000's of leaflets which I know will mostly end up on the floor (as I work in a Student Union and have seen this happen many times before) and my heart was in my stomach, it's all so sad. I'm going to see if I can find a new supplier that uses at very least a renewable source but when it comes down to it it's all about money and the people upstairs will probably have none of it. I've been talking alot with my friends recently about the idea of a 'carbon footprint' and that each and everyone of us has to be responsible for the carbon footprint one leaves behind. I'm sure mine is better than most as I don't drive, I cycle and I've never been in a plane (not entirely cause I haven't wanted to though), I'm not obsessed with buying new 'things' all the time but there are so many things I do do that I don't even consider as bad like having a bath everyday or having my computer or stereo or TV on all the time. Then there are things you have to do cause it's your job like I mentioned before. To be honest right now I just want out, I don't want any part of this, it all makes me sick. I would love to be self sufficient but to set yourself up like that you need money to start with. It's all a nasty capitalist/consumerist trap and I hate it. I can understand why most people don't like to think about it at all cause it just makes you unhappy. As I said before though do watch the film if you get the chance it may make you feel like shit but ignorance is for fools.

Had a pleasant weekend, my dinner went well and was bloody gorgous if I do say so myself! Went on another cycle ride, didn't manage quite the distance we did last week but it was fun never the less. We cycled around Rutland Water, it's truely beautiful up there, I love the way lakes have there own tide, it fascinates me, always happy to see the influence of the moon.
Yesterday was a bit of a nightmare woke up with a cricked neck, so had a horrible day at work in constant pain, wonder how many days of your life you spend with a bad neck, it's one of those unavoidable anoyances that spoils an endless number of otherwise normal days. Felt really sorry for myself by the time I got home as I had a busy day at work. So I got under a fluffy blanket and watched films all evening, I'm such a whuss I know! (have no idea how to spell whuss so used my imagination) To be continued...

Today is the Autumn equinox also known as Mabon (though I'm not to sure if Mabon is the old name for it or one the modern day Wiccans have given it.) Today the light and dark/ day and night are exactly equal again andit's the official end of the summer and start of Autumn. Being a bit of a nature worshipper I've been trying to celebrate all the sabbats, but it's actually quite difficult to keep track as there are eight of them. I've always loved halloween and midsummer and beltane (the day before mayday) seems an obvious one to celebrate. This is the first Mabon I've felt moved to recognize though and I'm doing this by cooking a feast for some of my friends. It will consist of some kind of stew with mash and an apple and a blackberry crumble with blackberries I picked in Norfolk and hopefully some apples from a friends garden. I really felt the need to cook some good wholesome food for my friends and am looking forward to it immensly! I think it's also a good opportunity to say a farewell to the summer (which has been fucking excellant) and hello to the autumn/winter, which I usually detest (well the winter anyway) but this year I'm going to roll with it, I'm going to enjoy it for what it is, a nice rest, and try not to moan to much! I wish everyone would celebrate the sabbats, a national holiday would be good, I think it's good to recognize these changes in season as they have a strong effect on the psyche (in my opinion anyway.) My friends find my need to celebrate them a little funny but they are always happy to join in especially if there is dinner involved! Anyway better go got to do the shopping! Happy Mabon everyone!
PS Mabon has associations with the green man, wondering if this is the reason for my current interest.
PPS I like Kate Bush's new song!

When we arrived at the beach, the destination of our cycle ride we all walked up to the sea and as we did our path was crossed by a large hare running across the beach, we all stopped and watched as the amazing creature flew across the sands at such a speed and dissapeared out of sight. It seemed so out of place there on the beach, some nearby dogs went crazy and try to chase after it but they were no match for the furiously fast hare. They are such beautiful creatures, facinating to watch, they stir something deep within my bones.

I've been having wierd coincidences involving hares. I know they are very symbolic and have discovered they are very linked to The Green Man, the moon, and the Goddess, three things that are very dear to me particularly at the moment. Here is a lovely 19th century children's poem I found by Walter la Mare.

In the black furror of a field
I saw an old witch-hare this night
And she cocked a lissome ear
And she eyed the moon so bright
And she nibbled of the green
And I whispered "Whsst! witch-hare
Away like a ghostie o'er the field
She fled, and left the moonlight there

Brilliant! Just had a wonderful weekend, managed to get out of the stinking city and into the glorious countryside, even managed to get to the sea, which is not an easy thing to do living in the midlands with no car (someone told me the other day that we are actually closer to space than we are to the sea.) Anyway we were rescued from our poverty stricken misery by some friends who invited us to come and stay at a lovely cottage in Norfolk. It was all very last minute but we got a lift up there Friday night after work and got back late last night.
The countryside is beautiful this time of year, all brambles and berries and the full harvest moon on Saturday night was magnificient! Saturday morning six of us went on a bicycle ride to the sea, turned out it was a 28mile round trip, which I think is the most exercise I've ever had in my life! It's a great way to see the countryside and a lovely way to get to the sea. Getting back to the cottage was quite difficult, it seemed to be up hill all the way, but I felt quite acomplished when we got in and fine once I'd drank 3 cups of tea and eaten about 20 biscuits in quick succession. So glad I have friends that recognize the importance of a good cycle in the country, it blows the cobwebs away!
Yesterday we went to another beach this time in the car though as we were all a little stiff, the boys played cricket, my friend filmed the beach with her new camera, and I built sandcastles as quick as I could before my friends 1 year old jumped on them.
I also read an article about the new 4hr Bob Dylan Documentary that is going to be on BBC 2. It sounds great, I love 'Don't look back' the D A Pennebaker documentary and think they are going to use the extra footage from it. I know there is also footage of the legendary concerts when he went electric, I've never seen folkies rioting so can't wait for that! Great to see the BBC are spending our licence money wisely, I've had a bee in my bonnet about the BBC ever since they started putting on so many bloody adverts for there other stations (which you have to pay for). If you ask me adverts are adverts but I'll stop before I start ranting again!
Anyway, yesterday after the beach we went back and had Fish and Chips then everyone went there separate ways and went home. Woke up this morning cold and in a bad mood. I'm starting to thaw out a bit now though.
I'm getting a bit peeed off with the fact that the only comments I've got so far in this blog have been people trying to sell me things. I didn't realise this was just going to be another way to get spamed, so to all those that want to try and sell me something, even if I wanted whatever it is your selling (which I don't) I can't afford it so leave me alone!

Here's a picture of the actual nine ladies stone circle.

The photo below is one of my favourites, it's me in one of my favourite places, the nine ladies stone circle in Birchover Derbyshire, doing one of my favourite things, that being collecting wood for a fire. There is really something about gathering wood whilst your out camping, it feels so natural that it must hark back to the days when the women would go out and collect wood while the men were out hunting! It's positively primeval. The silver birch wood that surrounds the nine ladies is such a magical place as is the moor you have to cross to get to it. Unfortunately the last time we were there it turned into a bloody holiday camp. Everytime I've been before people have been really respectful, camping a little way away from the stone circle so people have a quiet atmosphere to relax and reflect with the stones, they also use the same fire pits so the ground doesn't get overly scorched. This time however it was horrendous, it was a bank holiday so there were lots of people up there and they all had camps and fires right next to the circle, practically in the circle in fact, at night they were playing dance music and we even heard the sound of somebody hacking away at the trees with an axe to get firewood, it makes my blood boil just to think of this but what can you do aside from approaching a man in the pitch black darkness who is wielding an axe and telling him that chopping down trees is really not on. Whoever it was must have been a complete fucking imbecile and probably not the sort of person you want to get into an argument with. I'm sorry trees, I do feel awful about it. Anyway after we woke up and witnessed the Sunday walkers having to put up with people shouting and swearing and burning plastic, we decided that we really didn't want to be any part of this. We felt real bad for the locals and the people that had walked miles to see the stones and realised how they must hate us all, anyway I don't think I could go back there now, not to camp anyway, in fact I seriously considered complaining to some authority to try and stop people camping up there at all, it should be protected. It's such a shame some people have to be such arseholes and ruin it for the rest of us but such is life I suppose. So the photo means more to me cause it's probably the last chance I'll have to do one of my favourite things in one of my favourite places. But rest assured I will be back to the nine ladies, I adore the place, it's one of Englands best kept secrets, well it was!
There is a campsite not far away in Birchover called Barn Farm which has peacocks and buffalo and great ammenities but you can't have fires, which is a pity esspecially if its cold, You can always warm up in the local pub though, they sell the nicest lager called 'Warsteiner' that contains no chemicals, additives or preservatives and is made from forest spring water, the landlord is a very friendly character too. Christ! I should work for the Birchover tourist board.
Right I'm going to stop this rambling and risk leaving work in the rain, otherwise I'll be here all night.
I'll just leave you with this thought;
I recieved this in an email this morning from a friend;


TAKE HOLD OF EVERY MOMENT

A friend of mine opened his wife's underwear drawer and picked up a silk paper wrapped package:

"This, - he said - isn't any ordinary package."
He unwrapped the box and stared at both the silk paper and the box.

"She got this the first time we went to New York, 8 or 9 years ago. She has never put it on. Was saving it for a special occasion.Well, I guess this is it. He got near the bed and placed the gift box next to the other clothings he was taking to the funeral house, his wife had just died. He turned to me and said:
"Never save something for a special occasion. Every day in your life is a special occasion".I still think those words changed my life.
Now I read more and clean less.
I sit on the porch without worrying about anything.
I spend more time with my family, and less at work. I understood that life should be a source of experience to be lived up to, not survived through. I no longer keep anything. I use crystal glasses every day. I'll wear new clothes to go to the supermarket, if i feel like it.
I don't save my special perfume for special occasions, I use it whenever I want to. The words "Someday..." and "One Day..." are fading away from my dictionary. If it's worth seeing, listening or doing, I want to see, listen or do it now. I don't know what my friend's wife would have done if she knew she wouldn't be there the next morning, this nobody can tell. I think she might have called her relatives and closest friends.She might call old friends to make peace over past quarrels. I'd like to think she would go out for Chinese, her favourite food. It's these small things that I would regret not doing, if I knew my time had come.
I would regret it, because I would no longer see the friends I would meet, letters... letters that i wanted to write "One of this days".I would regret and feel sad, because I didn't say to my brothers and sons, not times enough at least, how much I love them.Now, I try not to delay, postpone or keep anything that could bring laughter and joy into our lives.And, on each morning, I say to myself that this could be a special day.Each day, each hour, each minute, is special.If you got this, it's because someone cares for you and because, probably, there's someone you care about.If you're too busy to send this out to other people and you say to yourself that you will send it "One of these days", remember that "One day" is far away... or might never come. .

The wedding went wonderfully well by the way. My friend, the bride looked beautiful, as you can see though from the above no amount of preening will turn me into a lady!
I've been reading other peoples blogs today, found some great ones, such an easy way to meet like minded people, just going through peoples profiles, I particularly enjoyed iwasariot.blogspot.com he was a Billy Liar fan too and what a star!
They're playing a Bert Bacharach medley on the radio and it reminded me of a game me and Mickylove play sometimes on our way home from a drunken night out, we usually end up walking, which takes hours so we sing, last time we tryed to remember all the Bacharach and David songs we knew, usually we try to recreate the whole of 'Tommy' , it's good fun and before you know it your home and it also saves you from getting into one of those screaming arguments that can sometimes occurr when one is rat-arsed. I should add that I'm a right sod for getting the screaming habdabs and generally have to apologise profusely in the morning, so any way singing keeps me subdued and in high spirits untill I get to my bed! We do a marvelous version of 'Close to you' and 'I'll never fall in love again' he has so many songs the possibilities are endless. Better get going home.
Moonpie

Hi there,
Goodness, I'm in a jolly good mood today, my last post set me off, the photograph is of me and me pals in Glastonbury on one of the most enjoyable days of my life, ooooh the fun we had!
I'm generally a happy type, but at times my senses are so dulled, that I just don't feel anything at all but today I feel quite ecstatic and I have no idea why, maybe it's something I ate! Anyway feeling this way I feel qualified to instruct the rest of the world how to be happy so here are my 10 steps to a happy head;

1.) Learn to love nature, when you look at a tree, or a meadow, or a moor covered in heather, feel it, let it fill your heart, let it feed your soul!
2.) Keep an open mind, there is far more to this earth than most would have you believe, be open to it, there are many layers to life, search for them.
3.) Count your blessings, don't dwell on what you haven't got but what you have.
4.) Don't believe the hype, don't fall for all the lies that are constantly shoved down your throat about all these marvelous things you need when really you don't. Don't get hung up on 'things'.
5.) Go out dancing on a regular basis.
6.) Be a good friend and you'll have lots of good friends.
7.) Smile at people, be polite and courteous.
8.) Be creative, don't just sit there do something, anything, just do it. (this is the one I have most trouble with unfortunately!)
9.) Educate yourself, the world is full of the literature/music/films etc. that aren't nessesary sold in waterstones/in the top ten/on at the cinema, find it for yourself, there is more out there than you could possibly imagine, look for it and you will find!
10.) Do what you want, you don't have to live by anybody elses rules or constaints, you can work out for yourself whiether someting is a good idea or not, you have all the information already within you, look to yourself and listen carefully.

So there you go it's as easy as that (if only!) Well it's a bloody good start anyway and it works for me (on most days.) If anyone can think of anything I should add please comment. I just realised that the last point means that you shouldn't pay any attention to the other nine points. Oh well, I don't think anyone reads this anyway!
Have a fun weekend.
Moonpie

A Perfect Day
Go to the Glastonbury festival with four of your best mates, have a few cups of Pear Cider, go to a fancy dress stall, get dressed up like a bunch of freaks, dress up the man working in the shop, then spend the rest of the afternoon leaping around to irish music, getting photos taken of you by complete strangers, drinking lots more pear cider and generally soaking up that marvelous Glastonbury ambiance.