Goodness me, I feel so miserable today. I've been feeling totally uninspired, I haven't posted for nearly a week. Had two extemely late nights at the weekend, going to bed at dawn for two nights running doesn't usually effect me so much, I think it's cause I can handle it in the summer as I have so much more energy however it has very nearly done me in this week. And today is so grey, I just feel tierd and depressed.
My tree has started turning yellow today too (I say my tree, it isn't actually mine, it's a large Oak I pass everyday) yesterday I saw it and I proudly remarked to myself how green and strong it was still looking, today it has small patches of yellow leaves, it'll still hold onto them for a while yet but it is giving in to the draw of winter and that makes me sad. I said I wasn't going to let winter get me down this year, my plan was to learn how to meditation and sit in a beautiful green field inside my head until spring comes. I haven't learn't meditation though, I don't know where to start and when I feel like this I don't feel inspired enough to learn. I just want to sleep. Then even my dreams seem to be exhausting at the moment. I've started to read 'Man and his Symbols' by Carl Jung which is really interesting but I found myself trying to analyse my dreams while I'm still asleep!
Oh woe is me! I really should try and shake myself out of it, I only need to watch the news to see how lucky I am. The awful things people go through, my heart goes out to the people who have lost there families and friends in the earthquake in Pakistan. And my boyfriend has just read 'The Railway Man' by Eric Lomax, it's a true story about a japanese prisoner of war, even the brief outline of the story he gave me choked me up. The strength the human spirit, through the most terrible circumstances, is just astonishing. And here I am moaning cause the weather is a bit crap, it's ridiculous. I'm going to go home now play some music loudly have a good sing, possibly a dance and shake this melancholy (hopefully!)